The rain has been falling for three days, a cold, grey sheet that blurs the edges of the world and turns the cobblestones of the village square into slick, black mirrors, and you stand in the center of it all, your uniform soaked through to the skin, the wool heavy and cold against your shoulders, the weight of the iron breastplate pressing down on your chest like a stone from which you have not yet lifted, watching the mud swirl around your boots, watching the water find the cracks in the stone and seep into the earth, knowing that the water will not stop, that the rain is not an enemy but a constant, a fact of the season, just as the duty you bear is a fact of your life, a duty that has grown so large it has swallowed the man you were before, the man who knew how to laugh, who knew how to love a woman named Elara in the quiet hours of the night, a woman whose face you can no longer remember clearly, only the warmth of her hand, the sound of her breath, a warmth that feels like a ghost story now, a memory from a life that no longer exists, a life that has been replaced by the rhythm of the patrol, the sound of the boots, the smell of the wet wool and the iron, a smell that has become your own, a smell that identifies you to the world as something other than a man, something that belongs to the order, to the watch, to the silence that keeps the peace, a silence that is not peace but a holding of breath, a suspension of violence, a tension that you feel in your teeth, in your bones, in the deep places of your mind where the thoughts go to hide, you feel the tension in the air, in the way the villagers look at you, not with fear, for they are too tired to be afraid, but with a kind of weary resignation, a look that says you are part of the furniture, part of the stone, part of the cold, a look that does not see you, that sees only the function, the role, the mask, a mask that you have worn so long it has become your face, a face that you cannot remove, a face that you do not want to remove, for if you remove it, you do not know who is underneath, you do not know if there is anyone underneath, you only know that you are tired, so tired that the bones ache, so tired that the mind slows, so tired that you would give anything for a moment of rest, a moment of quiet, a moment where you are not the watch, not the law, not the wall between the chaos and the order, but you cannot rest, you cannot stop, you must keep walking, you must keep watching, you must keep the eyes open, the ears sharp, the hands ready, for there are those who do not believe in the order, who see the law as a chain, who see the watch as a tyrant, who see you not as a man but as a symbol, a symbol of the power that holds them down, a power that they hate, a power that they resent, a power that they want to break, and they will try, they will always try, they will throw stones, they will shout, they will strike, and you will stand, you will not move, you will not strike back, for that is the law, that is the duty, that is the way it is, you have told yourself this a thousand times, you have said it in the dark of your room, you have said it in the light of the day, you have said it to the men who serve with you, you have said it to the captain, you have said it to yourself in the mirror, looking at the eyes that do not blink, the mouth that does not smile, the face that is stone, and you have believed it, or you have pretended to believe it, for it is easier to believe the lie than to face the truth, the truth that you are not stone, that you are flesh, that you are blood, that you are a man who loves, who feels, who hurts, a man who is broken, a man who is losing, a man who is fading, a man who is becoming less, and the less is a cold place, a dark place, a place where the light does not reach, a place where the heart stops, a place where the soul dies, and you are going there, you are walking toward it, step by step, day by day, year by year, and you do not see it, you do not see the edge, you do not see the drop, you only see the next step, the next duty, the next hour, the next moment, and you take it, you take it, you take it, and the world turns, and the rain falls, and the mud rises, and you stand, and you watch, and you wait, and the waiting is the punishment, the waiting is the price, the waiting is the cost, and you pay it, you pay it with your years, you pay it with your love, you pay it with your life, and you call it duty, you call it service, you call it honor, and you wear it like a crown, a crown of thorns, a crown of ice, a crown of silence, and you do not take it off, you do not take it off, you do not take it off, and the days pass, and the years pass, and the village changes, the houses are built and burned, the trees grow and die, the children are born and grow old, and you are there, you are still there, you are the same, you are the stone, you are the wall, you are the watch, and the watch never sleeps, the watch never rests, the watch never stops, and you are the watch, you are the watch, you are the watch, and the rain falls, and the rain falls, and the rain falls, and you stand, and you stand, and you stand, and the world turns, and the world turns, and the world turns, and you are there, you are there, you are there, and you do not know why, you do not know how, you do not know when, you only know that you are there, you only know that you are standing, you only know that you are waiting, and the waiting is the end, the waiting is the beginning, the waiting is the middle, and there is no other time, there is no other place, there is no other you, there is only the standing, the watching, the waiting, and the rain, the rain, the rain, and the silence, the silence, the silence, and the stone, the stone, the stone, and you are the stone, you are the stone, you are the stone, and the stone does not feel, the stone does not love, the stone does not hurt, the stone does not dream, the stone does not hope, the stone does not wait, the stone is, and you are, and you are, and you are, and the rain falls, and the rain falls, and the rain falls, and the world is wet, and the world is cold, and the world is dark, and the world is still, and you are still, and you are still, and you are still, and the stillness is the death, the stillness is the life, the stillness is the truth, and you know it, you know it, you know it, and you let go, you let go, you let go, and the stone falls, and the stone breaks, and the stone is gone, and you are gone, and you are gone, and you are gone, and the rain stops, and the rain stops, and the rain stops, and the sun comes out, and the sun comes out, and the sun comes out, and the world is bright, and the world is warm, and the world is alive, and you are not, you are not, you are not, and the world turns, and the world turns, and the world turns, and you are not, you are not, you are not, and the silence remains, the silence remains, the silence remains, and the silence is the end, the silence is the end, the silence is the end, and you are the end, you are the end, you are the end, and the end is the beginning, the end is the beginning, the end is the beginning, and the beginning is the stone, the beginning is the stone, the beginning is the stone, and the stone is you, the stone is you, the stone is you, and you are the stone, you are the stone, you are the stone, and the stone is eternal, the stone is eternal, the stone is eternal, and you are eternal, you are eternal, you are eternal, and the rain falls, and the rain falls, and the rain falls, and the world is wet, and the world is cold, and the world is dark, and the world is still, and you are still, and you are still, and you are still, and the stillness is the death, the stillness is the life, the stillness is the truth, and you know it, you know it, you know it, and you let go, you let go, you let go, and the stone falls, and the stone breaks, and the stone is gone, and you are gone, and you are gone, and you are gone, and the rain stops, and the rain stops, and the rain stops, and the sun comes out, and the sun comes out, and the sun comes out, and the world is bright, and the world is warm, and the world is alive, and you are not, you are not, you are not, and the world turns, and the world turns, and the world turns, and you are not, you are not, you are not, and the silence remains, the silence remains, the silence remains, and the silence is the end, the silence is the end, the silence is the end, and you are the end, you are the end, you are the end, and the end is the beginning, the end is the beginning, the end is the beginning, and the beginning is the stone, the beginning is the stone, the beginning is the stone, and the stone is you, the stone is you, the stone is you, and you are the stone, you are the stone, you are the stone, and the stone is eternal, the stone is eternal, the stone is eternal, and you are eternal, you are eternal, you are eternal.