The Wistful Dinner

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The candle sputtered. Thomas watched the flame die, then reignite, a small, stubborn heartbeat in the dark. He sat alone in the high-backed chair, the wood cold against his spine. Outside, the wind howled through the iron lattice of the window. It sounded like a beast. Or a man. Or perhaps just the house settling into its bones.

Thomas was a scribe. A clerk of minor importance. He had ink on his fingers. He always had ink on his fingers. It stained the creases of his knuckles black, a map of his labor. He looked at his hands. They were not strong hands. They were not hands that held a sword. They were hands that held a quill.

The door opened.

It did not creak. It swung wide, silent and terrible. Sir Aldric stood in the frame. He wore his armor, the steel dull with age and dust. His face was a mask of stone. Behind him, the corridor was empty. The shadows seemed to lean in, curious.

"Thomas," Aldric said. His voice was low. A rumble in the chest.

Thomas did not stand. He looked at the floor. The carpet was worn thin in the center. "My Lord."

"Come."

Thomas stood. His legs felt weak. He followed. They walked through the long hall. The portraits on the wall stared. They had eyes that did not blink. They watched the scribe walk. They watched the knight walk. They knew what was coming. Thomas felt their gaze like a physical weight. A hand on his shoulder. A thumb pressing into the bruised meat of his neck.

They reached the throne room. It was vast. The air was stale. The smell of old wax and colder stone. Aldric sat on the dais. The chair was carved from oak. It looked like a cage.

"Sit," Aldric said.

Thomas sat. The chair opposite was smaller. Lower. It felt like a stool for a child.

Aldric leaned forward. His elbows rested on his knees. He looked at Thomas. Really looked. Not at the clerk. At the man. At the fear.

"Do you know what I am?" Aldric asked.

Thomas blinked. "My Lord."

"I am a monster," Aldric said.

The words hung in the air. They did not dissolve. They settled. Like dust.

Thomas frowned. "I do not understand."

Aldric smiled. It was a thin, broken thing. "You write my deeds. You record my victories. You write that I am a hero. That I am just. That I am good."

Thomas nodded slowly. "I write the truth, My Lord."

"The truth?" Aldric laughed. It was a dry sound. Like leaves skittering on stone. "The truth is that I am afraid. The truth is that I hate this crown. The truth is that I want to run. I want to burn it all down."

Thomas felt a chill. It started in his fingertips. It moved up his arms. It settled in his chest. He thought of the birds.

He had seen them that morning. In the courtyard. A pair of sparrows. They had built a nest in the eave. He had watched them. They were small. Brown. Unremarkable. But they were alive. They had fledged. They had flown. They had left the nest.

Thomas looked at Aldric. He saw the same thing. The trap. The cage. The fear of the sky.

"I cannot let you go," Thomas said.

Aldric’s eyes widened. "What?"

"You cannot run," Thomas said. His voice was steady. It surprised him. "You are the wall. The wall holds. If you run, the wall falls. If the wall falls, the people die. The children. The old. The weak. They die in the street."

Aldric looked away. He stared at the floor. "I do not care about them."

"You do," Thomas said. "You care. You just do not know it yet."

Aldric turned back. His face was hard. "You are a clerk. You have no power. You have no voice. You are nothing."

"I am the record," Thomas said. "I am the memory. When you are gone, I am what remains."

Aldric stood up. The chair scraped against the stone. The sound was sharp. Violent. He walked down the dais. He stopped before Thomas. He was tall. Towering. He blocked out the light.

"You will write my death," Aldric said. "You will write that I was a tyrant. That I was a monster. You will write that I deserved to die."

Thomas looked up. He did not look away. "I will write the truth."

"And what is the truth?" Aldric demanded. He leaned in. His breath smelled of iron. Of blood.

"The truth is that you are afraid," Thomas said. "And that is human."

Aldric froze. The anger in his eyes flickered. It died. In its place was something else. Something soft. Something broken.

"Help me," Aldric whispered.

Thomas did not move. He could not. His body was locked. His mind was racing. He thought of the sparrows. He thought of the nest. He thought of the egg. The shell. The break.

"I cannot help you," Thomas said.

Aldric stepped back. He looked at Thomas with pity. "Then I am alone."

He turned. He walked away. His armor clanked. A slow, rhythmic sound. A funeral march.

Thomas sat alone. The silence returned. It was heavy. It pressed against his ears. He closed his eyes.

He remembered the moment before. The moment when Aldric had asked him to write his death. Thomas had felt a surge of power. A terrible, cold power. He had wanted to say no. He had wanted to save Aldric. He had wanted to be the hero. The savior. The one who breaks the cage.

But he had said no. Not because he was brave. But because he was a clerk. He knew his place. He knew the limits of his ink.

He opened his eyes. The candle was gone. The room was dark. He could see the stars through the high window. They were cold. Distant. Indifferent.

He stood up. His legs trembled. He walked to the desk. He lit a new candle. The flame was small. Fragile.

He picked up his quill. He dipped it in the ink. The ink was black. It looked like night.

He began to write.

He wrote about Aldric. He wrote about the fear. He wrote about the cage. He wrote about the wall.

He wrote about the sparrows.

He wrote that they had flown.

He wrote that they had left the nest.

He wrote that the nest was empty.

He wrote that the air was cold.

He wrote that the wind was loud.

He wrote that Thomas was alone.

He wrote that Thomas was afraid.

He wrote that Thomas was a monster.

He stopped.

He looked at the page. The words were there. Black. Sharp. True.

He had written the truth.

But the truth was not enough.

The truth was a lie.

The truth was a cage.

Thomas looked at his hands. The ink was dry. It was part of him now. It was in the skin. In the bone.

He thought of the sparrows again. He imagined them in the sky. Free. Wild. Unburdened.

He imagined them crashing into the ground.

He imagined the blood.

He imagined the silence.

He put down the quill.

He stood up.

He walked to the door.

He opened it.

The corridor was dark. The shadows were deep.

He stepped out.

He walked.

He did not know where he was going.

He did not know why he was walking.

He only knew that he was moving.

He moved away from the desk.

He moved away from the ink.

He moved away from the truth.

He moved toward the wind.

He moved toward the dark.

He moved toward the end.

He was a clerk.

He was a man.

He was a monster.

He was free.

He was alone.

He was dead.

The wind howled.

The stars watched.

The house held its breath.

And the ink dried.

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